GSOH completely absent

Incredibly misguided complaint

FC Porto's Hulk

Football takes itself too seriously at times. Players treated like deities complain they’re actually treated like dogs. Managers storm out of press conferences when someone has the audacity to ask a question. Rivalries which flair twice a season are given the same coverage as a small war.

Yet in all the years I have followed football, I struggle to recall an incident at which I’m more incredulous. In Wednesday’s Manchester City v FC Porto game, Porto had a player called Hulk. The City fans mocked him with the tame, witty chant “You’re not incredible”. That’s funny! Unless you are FC Porto.

Rui Cerqueira, the Porto spokesman, has indicated that the incident will be reported to UEFA on the grounds that the City support acted in an unacceptable way. Apart from demonstrating a total lack of perspective, it’s ironic because in the home leg, Porto’s fans were heard chanting racial abuse – specifically monkey chants. Porto are amazed that this has caused offence, and have sought to deny it. City’s Sergio Agüero has the nickname ‘Kun’ and Cerqueira claimed that the City fans were chanting Kun, Kun, Kun. That’s faintly plausible, except that Aguero wasn’t on the pitch at the time.

Cerqueira and his employers need to have a look in the mirror. Funny chanting is good. One of the best I know of is the chant that fans directed at Andy Goram after he was diagnosed with schizophrenia – “two Andy Gorams, there’s only two Andy Gorams”. Wit is welcome, racial prejudice isn’t. So before Porto whine like spoilt children about others, maybe they should get their own house in order. On a positive note, City won 6-1 on aggregate, which I would say is karma.

Incredible hoops

Moon penis

Via my faraway friend dvdhth:

Still wouldn't satisfy Jordan

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