RIP Tyler Clementi

Tawdry prank leads to suicide

Tyler Clementi in happier times

Tyler Clementi, an American student, has jumped to his death in the Hudson River after being outed as gay on the internet. His roommate Dharun Ravi, and Ravi’s friend Molly Wei colluded to broadcast online Clementi in a sexual encounter with another male in his dorm room. Upon finding out, Tyler saw his only option to be ending a promising life. I’m sure Ravi and Wei hadn’t thought their actions would lead to such tragic consequences, but this is what can happen when mockery descends into outright vile bullying. Coming out must be one of the biggest decisions of any gay persons life – to have this decision taken away from him pushed Clementi over the edge. The breach of trust inflicted upon him is comparable to rape, and should be treated as such. Ravi and Wei deserve years in prison, and will probably have Tyler on their conscience for the rest of their lives. Tyler, rest in peace.

Idiots lining up

Idiot #19 – Myleene Klass. You may or may not be aware of my disdain for Myleene. Andy Almond sure is. Here’s why I hate the day her dad didn’t pull out. She is a press hungry media whore. Her latest ‘story’ is that a massive Hollywood star wanted to shag her, and for her to sign a confidentiality agreement about the act. Conveniently, and probably to deflect the inevitable libel/slander case, Myleene doesn’t name him. I’m 99% sure it’s horseshit. Myleene is trying to flog herself yet again (as if ads for M&S, Pantene and now Dubai weren’t enough). Plus she has prior form in self publicising bollocks. Much sympathy was directed her way after she chased off burglars then was reprimanded by police for brandishing a knife. Except it quite pan out like that. The call to police came from her publicist, ergo, Myleene was so threatened that she rang not law enforcers but story makers. The police denied ever reprimanding her. And who leaked the story to the media? Why, Myleene’s publicity team. Naturally. Myleene, fuck off. We’re fed up of your monumental crap. Lies, lies, lies.

Idiot #20 – Padraig Reidy. Paddy writes on the Guardian website about proposed regulations forcing council workers in Breckland, Norfolk, to clock out for cigarette breaks. Apparently, this news can “only be greeted with dismay”. Yeah, there’s some perspective. Up there with Pakistan floods, deaths in Afghanistan. Poor smokers. He then goes on to justify his habit as being, in part, due to the rigours of a previous job front of house in a restaurant, and the associated stress. Well, to destress I play Xbox. Am I allowed to do this on company time? Am I fuck. Paddy doesn’t disagree with the smoking ban, although apparently, “if we admit it”, it has reduced hospitality in the hospitality industry. Maybe for the 22% of adults who smoke (source – Cancer Research UK), but, if we admit it, it’s increased it for the 78% who don’t, asshat. He then argues that smoking may increase productivity, as someone denied their fag will just be sat at their desk thinking “NEED A FAG. NOW. ARGH”. And there’s the clincher. No. You. Don’t. Noyoudon’tnoyoudon’tnoyoudon’t. No-one needs cigarettes, anymore than they need heroin or alcohol. If I were to disappear every couple of hours for a hasty can of Special Brew I’d be disciplined quicker than you can say “Padraig Reidy, you haven’t got a cancerous lung to cough on”. Your argument is facile and childish, so please, do a Myleene and fuck off.

Idiot #21 – Marc Janko. Janko, an FC Twente player, clocked an elbow from Tom Huddlestone in Wednesday’s Champions League match against Tottenham. Huddlestone was a very naughty boy, but Janko has fucked me off by saying this – “With Huddlestone off and then Van der Vaart (who was sent off later), we would have stolen the three points. It’s sad they needed the ref’s help”. No, that’s not how things work. If Huddlestone had be dismissed, Van der Vaart may have been substituted off for another holding midfielder. He may have been injured in a tackle. He may have scored a hat-trick and won the game for Spurs. There’s no way of knowing, twat. Don’t make cockhanded statements that aren’t true. Now, join Myleene and Padraig whererver they fucked off too.

Rants over.

Hazel Blears

I’ve never liked Hazel Blears. Her, Harriett Harman, Theresa May – there’s something about the current band of female MPs which makes me think of mental cat women rather than rational decision makers. Which is why I love this video where she blatantly lies to the Daily Politics show. See for yourself:

BNP infighting

Whilst there will always be bigots, it pleases me that they can’t get along. Infighting and serious financial issues are destabilising the BNP. I’m not even going to dignify the ignorant wanksocks by naming them. Suffice to say, I hope they rip themselves apart from the inside out and disappear from our attention until the next band of deluded turds crawl out of the cesspit.

In other news

-Getting sick. Not cool.

What CJ does when he’s not on Eggheads.

Remi Gaillard – funny man.

Team Calvin Harris:

Right, off for an omelette. Night, homes.