Oh, piss off. Doesn’t your back hurt still?
So I get up at 8.30 on Sunday morning. I’m quite prepared to do this, every now and again. Especially when Glastonbury tickets are going on sale. I’m thinking Radiohead, Kanye West, The Rolling Stones, David Bowie, The Strokes, Weezer, Foo Fighters, Phil Collins, Underworld, Tiesto. Luckily, I get tickets for me and Dave. And then U2 rumours start. Now, after this years cancellation it was inevitable, but I hoped that it was a case of the moment passing. Please don’t let it be U2. Glasto can be sanctimonious enough without that spouter of pious hypocrisy banging on from the Pyramid Stage. What’s more, U2 have been pretty rubbish since the 90s, which is about the same time Bono got sunglasses surgically grafted to his stupid peanut head. I hope that the rumours aren’t true. Julian Casablancas et al – Pilton needs you.
An aside – Bill Bailey demonstrates what a technical failure at a U2 gig would sound like:
Politics in North America
The US political system is so twisted and PR driven, that political candidates have to issue denials that they aren’t witches. But then Christine O’Donnell shoots herself in the foot by stating ‘I’m you’. Well, as far as I’m concerned, the only possible way of her being me is polyjuice potion. Ergo, she must be a witch. See for yourself:
Politics in South America
They’re just brilliant. Nowhere else in the world would the President organise a football match against a political foe. Then knee one of the opposition players in the bollocks. Miliband v. Miliband anyone? Here’s the cock shot:
I don’t get it, still. How is being shrinkwrapped art? The ‘artist’, Lawrence Malstaf, says he wants viewers to see “the humanity, the breathing, the gentleness, the beauty”. YOU”RE WRAPPING PEOPLE IN CLINGFILM. How is that artistic?! I really see nothing there, apart from a bizarre stunt akin to putting your head in a plastic bag. Surely there has to be a limit, where it stops being ‘art’ and starts being ‘wank’. Although I’d imagine someone has already tried to pass wank off as art. Methinks I’ll just keep on ignoring it.
In other news
-We all saw that coming.
-Him & Her – superb.
I like this:
Right, melon. Au revoir.