Stop Football

Fifa wallow in mud, pat backs

Yeah, and Shipman's game was bingo

Anyone who reads my blog ever knows I love football. Despite all the talk last week being about Ryan Giggs and his wayward penis, Saturday’s Champions League final was a feast. Barcelona were pushed but ultimately showed their class against a lacklustre Manchester United team. And yet Fifa are doing everything they can to undermine the on-the-pitch goodies.

Election for the presidency of Fifa is due to take place tomorrow, yet it is already a farce. Sepp Blatter, the incumbent shit-doesn’t-stick-to-me President will stand unopposed after his opponent, Mohamed Bin Hammam, was suspended due to bribery allegations. The timing of this suspension had NOTHING to do with the upcoming election. Not that Hammam looks innocent. He admits passing on cash, but insists it was expenses money for the extraordinary meeting he called. Yeah, sure.

Head of the CONCACAF region, Jack Warner, has also been suspended. Incredibly, he has urged voters in his region to support Blatter, even after he  said Blatter must be stopped. It’s also widely known that last years World Cup host vote was a fix. And 86% of Swiss people surveyed for a national newspaper believed Blatter is corrupt. So what now? Unfortunately, it seems like the whole tree is rotten. In all probability, it’s going to fall. If it comes down on the field of play, we might as well give up now.

Away from the dark comedy of the Fifa shitstorm, one of football’s modern greats quietly gave up the game. Paul Scholes was a terrible tackler, gave up on England at the height of his talent and was ginger. And yet, he was one of the greats of the game, earning platitudes from such exceptional peers as Zidane, Xavi and Henry. Yet for me, his finest moment came on a spring day in Bradford. Scholes, I salute you:

Senna

What if he were alive today. I can’t wait to see this:

More injunction gubbins

Another anonymous twitter user has been revealing supposed superinjunctions. Am I in breach of the law for passing this on? I have no idea. I hope so. Come after me. I’ll write a jail book, and make a mint.

So anyway, apparently footballer Gareth Barry has one out to hide an affair (apologies to any of my twitter followers if this is a bit familiar). Barry is soooo boring, both in style of play and personality. This affair (if true) would be the most interesting thing he’s ever been caught up in. So Gareth, you heard it from me first – go through them like a train. At least you’re doing something.

I feel sorry for those sports stars who are interesting. Lewis Hamilton joked at the weekend that he may be prone to stewards enquiries because he is black. I emphasise JOKED. He said it with his tongue so far in his cheek it was practically licking his ear drum. Yet, he’s had to apologise. And Formula 1 wonders why people call it boring?

sexymp.co.uk

So the above website is causing some consternation. Pious as peaches Lib Dem blogger Paul Walter wrote the following:

“Young people’s political ambitions are, almost invariably, shaped by role models.

“Those role models should be held up for their passion and views, not looks.”

Mr Walter, kindly put your toys back in your pram. Just because you ming doesn’t mean we can’t ogle a little:

*vomit*

In short, it’s fun. Enjoy it while it lasts.

In other news

-Too little, too late.

-Suppose that’s one way to stop a rapist.

-Burblings? Really?

Saw these darlings on Later… and really liked them:

Yuck.

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